Its it approaching eleven weeks since I crossed the finish line at the London Marathon and I my running could never be so far from form as it was back then.

On completing the race I was so sure that I would continue on, running long distances with ease and enthusiasm. Sadly that is far from the truth. Other runner friends said once completed my running will come to a halt and I struggled to believe them. I had high hopes that I would dust myself off after some time out, pick up the running and learn the joy again.

How wrong was I? I had my time out, I had my two week holiday (with short runs included) and then I returned to normal life with every intention to continue running and slip back into running long distances with ease.

It has not worked out that way.

I find myself struggling. Struggling, mainly with getting into the running mindset I had during the training and on race day itself. The days where my mind went to a different place enabling me to run for miles and miles on end are simply lost. I look back and wonder, how did I possibly get into this mindset? How did I manage to get through the miles without thinking about stopping? It just seems unobtainable to me right now.

Lately, I don’t seem to be able to get into a running mind, I find myself stopping consistently during a run and I am only running short distances – three miles at most.

I am not sure why; is it the training in Summer months, rather than Winter months that is causing my slump? Is my mind not here or have I simply lost it? If you loose it, how do you get it back?

Today I had an aim. I had an aim to run from Harlow Mill to Dobbs Weir – seven miles – along the river. A lovely route I managed with ease during my Marathon training. Today it was pure torture. It started well, running faster than my usual pace but then I quickly realised seven miles was unobtainable, I would have to cut it down. It was hot, even along the river, I was constantly checking my watch and my quad was tight – most likely due to the over zealous high kicks during last nights Body Combat. So I managed a slow three miles with a three mile walk back the way I came – which with it being such a warm, sunny day was pure bliss.

Having recently signed up for two further half marathons this year (Bedford Half and Hertfordshire Half) I need to learn how to run again. I need to find my running mojo. I need to learn to get back into the running mindset. And I need to do it soon.

However, with a little more time on my hands than usual to focus, several shorter races in the diary and with the aid of my new found love of parkrun I hope to start to rebuild and learn to run again.